Eagle Time

Full Version: this dead-ass forum [grossout] [nsfw] [gone viral]
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my fetid ass swells with decompositionary bloat gases and teems with feasting flies as it hovers over the new thread button on this dead-ass forum
a junkyard dog curiously sniffs at the molding, half-rotawayed form of this dead-ass forum, hoping for something that might be its next meal. instead it barfs onto the dead-ass forum, adding to the frothy sludge of foulness congealed inside
researchers from a prestigious european university pitch together for an expedition to this dead-ass forum. it's said the severe deadness of it has enabled it to sustain a mycological bouquet of at least twenty different species of fungi including one never before seen by man that is rumored to make small rodents braindead with its toxic spores
the epa declares this dead-ass forum a superfund site, despite high-up members of the epa demanding that it be kept open as an asset to the business community for unique industrial cleaning processes and also to the military industrial complex as a potential chemical agent whose use in conflicts the hague hasn't yet banned
a swamp thing rises out of the festering cesspool of this dead-ass forum's distended abdomen. "heya guys, got any peanuts n crackajack?" it asks to anyone in particular. poor thing has suffered so much brain pollution from the toxins in the intestine-water that it thinks society is an early 1900s vaudeville
garbage man swings by this dead-ass forum every week, shakes their damn head and passes by because a festers quest horrorshow job like that needs a special crew from state. eventually they report it to the city council who decides to throw a tarp over it. now children ride sleds down dead-ass forum hill every holidaytime despite the chiding of parents who warn of the trash yeti down under who gobbles up youngins
Buried 6ft under, rip
a gas-build up causes the outer shell to burst, revealing the wild and varied gut flora of this dead-ass forum. a mini george-of-the-jungle swings on a vine from tiny tree to tiny tree, but their grip slips and they fall into a pond of rainbow plankton/ algae/ cyanobacteria causing them to cry out in sheer pain as their skin melts off to the bone w/in 10 seconds
a big ol mound of maggots pulses steadily and happily on the eroding face of this dead-ass forum. the writhing maggot rhythm provides a sick enough house dance beat to be sampled by a liverpool dj in a #1 hit called LIVERMAGGOT PUS GUSHER (skinburrower remix)
this dead-ass forum is given "the boats" aka scaphism, even though it is already quite dead-ass just to make a mess

for those who don't know what scaphism is it's some ancient death sentence where the accused is placed in hollowed out thing like a boat, with another boat placed on top of that to provide a death cocoon which is left out in the sun. for days or weeks, at regular intervals, the accused is fed and smothered with milk and honey and they are left to fill up the joint with their doots and drips as flies and rats come in to gnaw on them until they finally kick it
this dead-ass forum is visited by the emperor of vultures, who kicks it around a bunch with its thrash-punk combat boots until all the organs spill out its mouth. before they settle in for the final feast, they emit in a deathmetal growl:
Doom looms, meet your vulture future
behold my hawkspace, ye mighty, and despair
they'll miss me, my dead-ass forum
for in it is COLD and never warm
time ain't helped this rotten form,
they'll miss me, my dead-ass forum.
mmm, this dead-ass forum sounds perfect for a little snack... don't mind if i do....

[Image: vulturesona.png]
Absolutely disgusting