You Wake Up In A Bar

You Wake Up In A Bar
RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
The Page 9 Recap
Starring: Drinkmaster Greene, Our Protagonist
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
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You rise in enthusiasm, and it's as if not a moment passed from the last instance of dialogue-- even if, in the back of your mind, you felt as if there had been quite the pause. It's time to properly greet the new arrivals, Bloomy and Sublimate.

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Your Egg Coordinator, Stax, has also risen in enthusiasm. You're still not sure to what extent this is genuine, but... it's a bit better than what felt like incessant complaints.

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Laren manages a smile. As conversation picks up momentum, you start preparing Sublimate's rather convoluted drink-- a large array of ingredients with varying portions. You begin pressing blueberries into a paste, hoping to extract the blue coloring, though it doesn't go exactly to plan.

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Bloomy sinks into Laren's weight, a bit concerned. It seems that your interpretation of the 'cat food casserole' may have hit a snag-- but you're not quite willing to give up yet. A bartender must necessarily improve and improvise. Hey, they're practically the same word anyhow!

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Something about what she's said seems to assure the cat, who relents-- though you can't really decipher what's being said.

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Sublimate squints her mechanical eyes towards you.

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Before you can properly respond and assure her, O'Hare raises his head, previously quite lost in thought. He speaks, concerned, in the sort of tone reminiscent of when you dosed yourself with a potent sedative. Oh, those were the days. The today days.

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The corrugiblator fires up-- and you begin corrugiblating the cocktail as fast as you can figure out its controls and read the cryptic manual. It's not the easiest task, though you do your best to keep conversation as you finish Sublimate's drink.

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Finally-- you shift around to hand the mechanical swan her order.

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Sublimate takes it between her wings with an audible 'creak', and though her grip is a tad shaky, she doesn't seem anything but confident-- excited.

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After finishing her fifth long sip on the ashen corrugible, Sublimate finally shares her thoughts, with a metal beak still wet with the incongruent substance.

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O'Hare finally finishes gathering his things- including the first aid kit he'd brought for you on his first arrival- and hoists them up to carry. He also places down a handful of coins.

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O'Hare has left very satisfied with both his drink and meal, and will likely come back again. You have gained fifty red glass tokens.

With a heap of pride, Stax motions to a hot skillet on the stove behind you-- currently cooking up what appear to be some... odd-looking eggs. You don't think they came from a chicken.

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As this is the final meal you're aiming to make until the midday lunch reaches its conclusion, you're nearly to your third bartending level. It has also been about 1/3rd completed with Stax's help, though you're not entirely certain what he's been doing with it this whole time.

Cup status: 1 occupied (Sublimate's Ashen Corrugible), 2 dirty (Rooted Bean, Dynamic Dynamite), 3 free
Plate status: 1 occupied (Bloomy's unfinished meal), 2 dirty (TQoaBT, Y,SY,S), 1 free
Scavenger ability: Activated (0 uses)
Intrusive ability: Enabled


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Due to your advanced 'tending on the Ashen Corrugible, you've gained several new entries for your codex of ingredients-- the Cabinet.

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Author's NotesShow
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-17-2018, 09:36 PM)☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆ Wrote: »but we don't have time for both an ice cream sandwich AND a massage, so while the corrugible is in the oven, we'll cover our hands with ice cream and give him an ice cream shoulder rub (which will really help with the too-hot-to-handle thing)

this will also help keep him cool. whisper in his ear "you got this" as he finishes the omelette. make sure to actually dump some cat food in there at least
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-27-2018, 02:39 PM)Fellow Wrote: »Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.
Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!
Duck, duck, duck, duck, GHOOST.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-27-2018, 04:12 PM)LammarWesley Wrote: »
(02-27-2018, 02:39 PM)Fellow Wrote: »Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.
Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!
Maybe those shouldn't be put in the batter though.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-27-2018, 04:24 PM)Fellow Wrote: »
(02-27-2018, 04:12 PM)LammarWesley Wrote: »
(02-27-2018, 02:39 PM)Fellow Wrote: »Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.
Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!
Maybe those shouldn't be put in the batter though.

We Eat Like Aliens We Live Like Aliens!

>PLACE ICECREAM N CHOCOLATE SAUCE IN BATTER
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
but only after we rub it on his shoulders!
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Is it just me or did Drinkmaster Greene suddenly gained the ability to open his eyes?
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
We also need to do something about the casserole. Put the eggs in an oven tin and then pile on cat food. Maybe do it in layers? Like eggs-dry cat food-wet cat food-dry cat food? It'd be like lasagna. Also put it in the oven I guess.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
cats LOVE lasagna, famously. especially when they asked for a casserole
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-28-2018, 05:36 PM)☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆ Wrote: »cats LOVE lasagna, famously. especially when they asked for a casserole
A casserole is pretty much everything that goes into the oven, right? Lasagna is a casserole and so is pizza. You could put roadkill into an oven tray and boom! Casserole.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
(02-28-2018, 11:43 AM)Fellow Wrote: »We also need to do something about the casserole. Put the eggs in an oven tin and then pile on cat food. Maybe do it in layers? Like eggs-dry cat food-wet cat food-dry cat food? It'd be like lasagna. Also put it in the oven I guess.

I was thinking of using the omelett in a fashion like that, but with some changes for this recipe:
Quote:3 flakes chowm
1 serving blueberries, all diced
1 Can catfood
1 Serving diced cucumber
1/2 Cup water

put in a casserole dish, and heat for 15 minutes.


>Apologize about earlier. I only just realized you add water to make a cubed goat into a goat. I thought it was just, add water to turn the cube into a cube of goat flesh
>Weird question but I don't know Crovis, but I'd love to know how to introduce myself in it to start, unless it's easier to learn via the PDA, which I should borrow during the next break,,
>Oh and for payment, Sublimate, I'd love you to surprise me with some ingredients of equal worth to what you'd pay for, if you can spare that.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
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The break is momentary. One moment passes; then the other. No month goes by, and you, Greene, spend not a single breath outside of yourself. Nothing progresses. Everything is fine. Everything is fine.

Stax has just confirmed that he's done with Bloomy's order of eggs. Looks like it's time to take the reins on that one!

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You start work on the cat's eventual dish. Stax's eggs go on the bottom of the pan, and then you start layering cat food on top-- wet layers and dry layers, being sure to separate them carefully with layers of chowm, diced blueberries, and diced cucumber, building what begins to seem like a stack of very unique lasagna.

Laren speaks up, seeming to want to generate an actual conversation in the bar that isn't mean-spirited.

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Bloomy beams brightly, and Sublimate begins to rattle off with some enthusiasm.

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As you push the pan into the QUIK-OVEN-1K, you glance back and try to get everyone in better spirits!

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Bloomy, however, seems a bit concerned.

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The idea strikes you that perhaps being able to understand Bloomy on the fly would be... helpful.

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However-- it seems the metallic swan is distracted by something. Something behind you. A marked carton of eggs, the one Stax used to make the base for Bloomy's lasagna casserole.

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Her mechanical eyes, though tough to be emotive with, seem to burn with fire. Stax seems... unfazed, though the accusation seems to have alienated the other members of the bar; both Bloomy and Laren lean back some, both confused and worried.

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You're not certain how to deal with this. The lasagna will be done by next turn, unless you were to take it out halfway and waste your efforts. You're not certain whether these eggs are safe cooked or not-- or even if Bloomy wants them now. It seems, however, that anything but quick and decisive action means Sublimate's about to attack Stax. And swans are definitely pretty good at attacking things.

Worrisome.

And right before your third bartending level, too.

Cup status: 1 occupied (Sublimate's Ashen Corrugible), 2 dirty (Rooted Bean, Dynamic Dynamite), 3 free
Plate status: 2 occupied (Bloomy's unfinished meal, Stax's unfinished meal), 2 dirty (TQoaBT, Y,SY,S), 0 free
Scavenger ability: Activated (0 uses)
Intrusive ability: Enabled


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Author's NotesShow
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
use laren's pda to look up parasitic worm egg facts.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Slow things down a bit so we can all talk this out. First and foremost no violence should occur in this respectable establishment. Second of all, explain and try to learn what the mishap with the eggs is all about.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Burn the lasagna to ash and force Stax to eat it.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
>Check if parasitic worm eggs are edible when cooked via the PDA.
>Ask Laren to help resolve this. Could Stax really have done this intentionally? And if he did dear fucking lord please, please leave Stax. Basic consideration for others is all that is being asked, and did Bloomy do anything to deserve that?
>Deeply apologize to Sublimate and Bloomy and start over if necessary. Have Stax leave.

edit:
(03-31-2018, 10:33 AM)Fellow Wrote: »Second edit: And, if the above is true, then he just wasted a lot of resources on our part and he should reemburse us for that lasagna. The angry swan in the room aughta convince him to pay up.

Yeah frankly he owes us for wasting our ingredients. He's very aware that not everyone can just guzzle anti-freeze and bleach, so I don't trust like that right now.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Hmm, I'd like to use the pda too, but it says in the description that sublimate needs quick and decisive action. Checking the web might not count as that.
If we do use the pda, we should announce clearly to sublimate that we'll throw the eggs out if they're toxic. Maybe even hold them near the garbage if they're

Edit: And yeah if Stax deliberately tried to give Bloomy food poisoning he should be shown the door.

Second edit: And, if the above is true, then he just wasted a lot of resources on our part and he should reemburse us for that lasagna. The angry swan in the room aughta convince him to pay up.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
Lets just quickly shove stax into another room and NOT feed Bloomy the casserole. I think they deserve a free meal after this.
We need to have a lil talk with stax.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
character concept: vebbit
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
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Stax.

What a ball of gas. Sometimes you wonder if he was any better outside of Terrats, but you suppose you'll probably never know. As with most of the residents, he seems content to keep all the bad bits of history hidden. If only you'd had Intrusive when you first met him!

But that's the least of your problems. Keeping Sublimate from a full-blown battle is at the top of the priority list, and you have a plan.

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You take Laren's PDA- a bit of a large, rectangular device, with retractable buttons, dials, a keyboard, and a large, extremely high-fidelity screen, that seems to 'zoom' to adjust your current gaze- and begin fiddling with the interface. You're logged onto something called the Starnet Wyreforums. Without paying much attention to the Wyre that Laren was logged onto, you tap on the search bar at the top, and input 'parasitic worm eggs'. Within an instant, you're thrown a list of largely badly-spelled titles, listed in order of date. The third-most recent catches your eye, as it actually has a couple of replies. You tap on it to find...

...a rather overwhelming wall of text.

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Transcripted by HandyBot33KShow

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You glance worriedly at the building tension in Sublimate's voice, and the building frown of Bloomy's expression, but you're trying your best to focus on this forum Wyre, and all you can give is an equally conflict-averse frown. Sublimate, in an act of pure fury, downs the rest of her drink in one fluid motion.

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Finally, you figure it out. Gotta cut this whole shenanigan short before it gets out of hand and paw and wing.

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Stax retracts a little. You can't tell if his expression is contempt or frustration, but you're having doubts that it's shame. Just as you've finished this reply, the QUIK-OVEN dings-- it's finished with Bloomy's lasagna. You begin to take it out, and plate an appropriate serving for the rather large cat.

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With a couple of slices, taking out a corner piece of the very, very odd 'cat food casserole', you've done it! This dish felt like it took almost two months to make, but nope-- just a few turns.

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Stax, at last, speaks, after nudging the counter absentmindedly with his glowing sun-leg.

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That's right, Greene. Despite that surprisingly workable ordeal, you've made it through midday. After leveling up, you have the intention of speaking to Stax in another room-- though there's a small hangup. Leaving the bar feels... weird. You've got a bit of an aversion to it, though you feel like you could overpower that aversion. The alternative is speaking to him right here and now, probably without a lot of professionalism in front of your patrons. You'll also have to figure out what approach you want to take with him.

Afternoon has passed. The time is now evening, which will tend to be the longest and most difficult segment of the day. You are given a several-turn break between segments of time to recover.

You have gained a bartending level. You may now pick up to three skills-- one from the first perk rank, and two from the newly discovered second perk rank. Any that you do not pick will be available again next time you level up, as well as a new rank.

{I} Intuitive: Introduction cards will show somebody's ingredient preferences.

{I} Copier: You can now use the Unshaken to replicate a drink you've previously made, once per day.

{I} Cannoneer: You can now pop the top off the Unshaken at will, releasing whatever reaction is inside.

{I} Scribe: You gain information about any ingredient at will, thrice per day.

{I} Drunken Faster: You can wash 1 dish per turn for free (a.k.a. still doing other things) while drunk.

{I} Drunken Master: Your attacks deal incredible damage while drunk.

{II} Mixmaster: Drinks or food with a special correlation with the current music being played will gain a massive bonus for most patrons capable of hearing.

{II} Audiophile: Music with a special correlation to a given patron or situation will passively increase approval and mood for those affected.

{II} Generator: The Unshaken can produce two servings of any named exotic liquid and add it to the Cabinet once per turn. This consumes Greene's action, and is risky when used by a non-bartender.

{II} Eraser: The Unshaken can be used to freely vacuum up, and instantly vaporize, contaminants in the air or in drinks, with settings based on particulate size.

{II} Baker: Bake like the ancient chefs of the stars, and cook any pastry in one turn.

{II} Speed Demon: Flip a coin to mix up to four drinks in one turn, or end up failing (and losing all ingredients).

{II} Phytogenesis: Greene can grow many plants for ingredients on their leafy surface, provided there's a consistent source of sunlight.

{II} Phytochemist: Greene can use moving branches to automatically make drinks or meals at half speed without requiring an action, provided there's a consistent source of sunlight.


Cup status: 0 occupied, 3 dirty (Rooted Bean, Dynamic Dynamite, Ashen Corrugible), 3 free
Plate status: 2 occupied (Bloomy's TGCB, Stax's unfinished meal [1/3] ), 2 dirty (TQoaBT, Y,SY,S), 0 free
Scavenger ability: Activated (0 uses)
Intrusive ability: Enabled


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By creating your first dish on an actual plate in a while, you've attained some new entries in The Cabinet!

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Author's NotesShow
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
>Phytochemist, Generator, and Copier.
Intuitive would ruin the fun.

I sure hope we don't get a whole new rank every level, otherwise it's gonna be impossible (or at least really slow) to get all the perks, and that bugs me way more than it should.

I'm not sure what approach is best to take with Stax, but I do know that either before or after we talk to him we need to get some dishes done.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
{I} Copier
{II} Generator, Eraser
Interesting set to choose from.
This setup should allow us to create improved versions of drinks for any repeat customers we may have. If we have any, of course.

Scribe and intuitive both have some pleasant synergy with the above three, but can wait for another time.
Quiet. Good for an unusual opinion. Doesn't talk much.
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RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
It's getting late so I'd think photo-anything is something we'd best get later.
>Copier, Generator, Audiophile

If we end up taking audiophile, we could put up a stax themed song to make him respond better to our scolding.

We've been informed we don't want to get out from behind the counter and I trust our golden boy to look out for our best intrests. I suggest we just huddle behind the counter and turn the volume of the music waaay up.
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