The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Quote:From what I remember, his name was on the gravestone, but it never specifically stated that he died


Hmm, the graveyard is magical, no ? If there's  grave, he's dead. .... Unless exile gets you a grave too ? (Don't tink so Sheila na nig didn't have an. then that is, because now she does, not that addler won't see it before a while.)

Hmmm, tegerioreo, looking at the first updates in this thread, I see the curse of photobucket ever sos lowly collapsing on itself seems to have struck some of the images. "this image is not disponible" error and whatnot.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
It was clearly (I thought) explained that the monuments in the Hall of Ancestors are monuments to the dead, not to the exiled or missing. The inscriptions typically give the name of the elf, and the manner of his/her death. Few of the monuments are deliberately constructed; instead they usually appear magickally at the moment of the elf's demise. Lord Randall's tombstone says "POISONED" which is borne out by the ancient folk ballad concerning him. It's unlikely that he could have faked his own death well enough to fool the ancient magick that operates the Hall.

SpoilerShow
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
But, out of curiosity, coulkd two elves share the same name, could there be two 'lord Randall's ? (I mean after all, thta could happen to lowfolks but low folks ar e alot morenumerous than elves and lives much less longer thus increasing the chances of the sme name being shared across genration and limiting confusion)

.Having a photobucket account myself I all too well understand the problem (I was not happy by the way they went about it either) .. Stupid question perhaps but, while I understand you stick to patreon or your blog for modern images update, why not transfer the images of the old ones on an imgur account (which is still free so far) or use tinyupload
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
(09-28-2020, 02:53 PM)tegerioreo Wrote: »It's unlikely that he could have faked his own death well enough to fool the ancient magick that operates the Hall.
Ah. That's pretty air tight. The only things I can add to my previous suggestion is: could he have died and been brought back to life? Maybe he erroneously believes he's Lord Randall. Or Lord Randall can be completely removed from the equation and that suggestion can be ignored entirely.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Quote:>Vernier: Point out to Adler that Lysander might not make a very good ally considering her betrayed the Duchess, his best and most dangerous customer, for a shockingly low amount of money.
>Vernier: Before you leave, lay out your theory for why Adler has such a weak spot for lowfolk ladies.
>Just remember all those graves of lowfolk betryed by their lowfolk lovers....
Adler: pook Vernier some gold and tell the Ixies to help her get Lysander here.

"Okay then," I blurted abruptly as I pulled a small sack of gold out of my Elfintory.  "Here's some petty cash you can use to persuade Lysander to come talk to me."

"But sir, Lysander is unreliable," Vernier protested.  "He betrayed Duchess O'Daisies, his best and most dangerous customer, for a paltry sum.  He would not make a good ally."

"That actually indicates to me that profit may not be the only thing that motivates him.  It's an admirable and interesting quality.  Besides, I'm not entering into an alliance with him right away.  We're just going to discuss a business deal.  Now, off you go."

0930shoo.gif

"But, but," Vernier stammered.  "Don't you want to hear my theory about why you have such a weak spot for lowfolk femmes?"

"Next time, next time," I insisted.  "You have a pressing mission back in town.  Now scoot!  Some of you Ixies, see to it that she gets home safely, then return to me."

Quote:>Well, greet "Uncle Ash" with allt he decorumand respect you are bale too considering the meager sicrumstances

As soon as Vernier left, I addressed the trees:  "Tell Ash I said .. hello to you too."

There was a rustling as the forest relayed my message, and a few minutes later a reply came back:  "Ash Marten says LOL whats up?"

0930suplol.gif

I sighed with mixed surprise and disappointment upon hearing this.  Did it mean he was a Vulpitanian?  Or was he merely a simpleton?  No .. he of course must be pretending to be a simpleton - but why?  I already knew enough about him to be sure that wasn't the case, and furthermore he KNEW that I knew.

Fine, I would play his game for a little while at least, just to see what would happen.

"Tell him I said nothing much, how about you?"
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
*Adorable plum-munching Mavis avatar by the incomparable Tronn.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Adler: This pseudo conversation awkwardly patters forward for some time.
>Adler: Realize this will go on forever if you let it. Ask for a face-to-face meeting. Try not to sound desperate.
>Ash: *In Person* "If you insist."
>Adler: *Manly Squeak*
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Lysander: You see the gold and are very enticed also when you see those cute bug creatures you grab your butterfly net to try and catch one.
Ixie: give this lowfolk scum a small zap but it was too much of one and knock him out.
Vernier: Proceed to drag the man all the way to the forest
Ixie: Don't apologize.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Quote:>Adler: This pseudo conversation awkwardly patters forward for some time.
>Adler: Realize this will go on forever if you let it. Ask for a face-to-face meeting.

Ash Marten and I traded inanities via the Voice of the Forest for what seemed like hours.

"Tell him I said, That's what she said," I sighed, in reply to the meaningless tidbit that had just been relayed to me.

"Ash Marten says ROTFFLMFDTO," the trees rustled wearily a few minutes later.  "Incidentally, how long are you going to keep this going, sir?"

"Tell him I said, This is getting tedious, let's talk in person," I declared.

After an interval of rustling, the answer came back:  "Ash Marten says, Scry me."

1007ohplz.gif

"I can't do that right now," I grumbled.  "Accessing the scry orb requires that I go into Faerie, and there's a time discrepancy between the worlds which might cause me to miss something important!  Once I figure out how to properly control the Gate, then I'll be able to scry, but not before!  Tell Ash I said ... uh ... just explain the situation to him."

There was an even longer interval while the trees parsed that message and relayed it.  I paced the circle while I waited.  Eventually a reply came rustling back:  "Ash Marten says Hey, no prob, I'll be around whenever your ready.  Meanwhile you can talk to Lysander.  C-ya!"

Quote:Lysander: You see the gold and are very enticed also when you see those cute bug creatures you grab your butterfly net to try and catch one.
Ixie: give this lowfolk scum a small zap but it was too much of one and knock him out.
Vernier: Proceed to drag the man all the way to the forest

1007whodat.gif

I jumped at the sudden sound of someone crashing through the bushes, and turned to behold Vernier dragging an unconscious person.

"Give me a hand with this guy, would you?" she grunted.

"Back so soon?" I babbled in astonishment.  "Who is that?"

"It's been several hours," Vernier grunted, dropping the monkey unceremoniously on the ground inside the circle.  "And this is Lysander.  You ordered me to fetch him, remember?"

"Is he drunk?" I asked suspiciously.

"He could be, for all I know - but that's not the reason he's passed out.  His eyes glinted when I showed him the gold, and they glinted even more when he spotted your bug-servants.  He tried to catch one with a butterfly net."

"We zapped the churl for his insolence," Typantronn reported.  "Twas meant to be a warning zap, but we did not properly co-ordinate our efforts, and the cumulative force rendered him unconscious."

"And heavy as a sack of bricks," Vernier added.
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
*Adorable plum-munching Mavis avatar by the incomparable Tronn.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Vernier: "By the way, now that I'm back perhaps you'd like to finally hear my theory about you and lowfolk women?"
>Adler: "I said *later*, woman!"
>Vernier: *Harrumph*
>Adler: While it was good that you finally got all that stuff off your chest, confiding in Vernier seems too have given her a slightly inflated sense of importance .
>Adler: Try and wake the monkey up. Slap him in the face, splash him with water, tickle him, and if all else fails, kick him in the jewels. That'd wake anyone up.
>Ixies: Place bets on what wakes the monkey up.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Vernier: Warn Adler about Lysander "Careful before you wake him up, monkey's are a very sneaky people. Make sure he doesn't steal your coinpurse."
Adler: You had no idea that Vernier was prejudiced inquire about this attitude.
Vernier: Go off on a short tangent about how the Monkey's control the worlds economy thru secret cabals and guilds.
Adler: "Oh great she is insane" you think
Adler: Wake him up by having an Ixie run another electrical charge through him, if that doesn't work
Lysander: Get immediately bitchy when you wake up saying you need financial reparation for your head hurting now, don't even introduce yourself or ask who this man before you, first thing first, finances.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Quote:>Adler: Try and wake the monkey up. Slap him in the face, splash him with water, tickle him
Vernier: Warn Adler about Lysander "Careful before you wake him up, monkey's are a very sneaky people. Make sure he doesn't steal your coinpurse."

"How do I wake this guy up?" I asked, prodding the unconscious monkey with my foot.

"You should be careful about doing that," Vernier warned. "Monkeys are larcenous and crafty. He will surely try to swindle you."

"Trust me," I remarked. "I've dealt with sneaky & sly schemers before."

1014goosh.gif

Poking Lysander in the ribs wasn't having any noticeable effect, so I got a glass of water from the basin and threw it in his face.

"WAKE UP, LYSANDER!" I yelled, shaking him.

He did not respond.

Quote:>Ixies: Place bets on what wakes the monkey up.
Adler: Wake him up by having an Ixie run another electrical charge through him

"That didn't work," Typantronn observed. "That's an aphid each from Aspidastra, Calliope, Peregrinetta, and Margaret."

"Double or nothing on the next one!" the other Ixies insisted.

"Stop your incessant gambling and help me!" I snapped. "Can't you awaken him with another magickal zap?"

"Why would he be wakened by the selfsame force that knocked him out?" Typantronn replied saucily. "Carry on, Sire. Thou'rt doing great."

1014zetz.gif

I slapped Lysander vigorously across the face, but he still did not respond.

"Two aphids!" Typantronn cackled.

"Let it ride!" the other Ixies wailed. "Double or nothing!"

Quote:if all else fails, kick him in the jewels.
Lysander: Get immediately bitchy when you wake up saying you need financial reparation for your head hurting now, don't even introduce yourself or ask who this man before you

"Well," I declared loudly. "I guess there's nothing left but to administer the Crotch Punch of Life."

1014indignant.gif

Suddenly the monkey leaped to his feet.

"Four aphids!" Typantronn crowed. "Pay up, sisters!"

"PAY UP, MISTER!" Lysander exclaimed. "I demand full financial restitution for the loss of potential earnings after being involuntarily spirited away from my place of business -"

"The tavern," Vernier interjected.

"I also require compensation for the cleaning bill on my shirt and trousers after being dragged through the woods," Lysander continued without missing a beat. "As well as full replacement of a suede vest, damaged by sloshing water on it, and one premium butterfly net destroyed by dangerous and untamed insectoid creatures. I'll be sending you an itemized invoice for all items, plus pain and suffering and emotional trauma from being repeatedly abused and threatened with the Crotch Punch of Life."
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
*Adorable plum-munching Mavis avatar by the incomparable Tronn.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Lysander: Keep using words and phrases like "oy vey", "bupkis", "chutzpah", and "kvetch". Also, keep referring to Vernier and Adler as "gentiles".
>Adler: Accuse Lysander of faking it. He didn't pipe up until he heard reference to crotch punching. Lysander was faking an injury to extract money from you. You're proud of yourself for figuring this out, you know how lowfolk work now.
>Lysander: You bristle at being referred to as a "lowfolk".
>Vernier: *scoff* This is such typical monkey behavior.
>Lysander: Accuse both Vernier and Adler of being Anti-Monketic!
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Lysander: Begin faking a knee injury even though no one touched your knees "OW! OW, OW, OW! You brutes hurt my knees I need more gold for that surgery now, oh and a bribe for me not to call the guards on you for assault"
Adler: Is this lowfolk serious? Does he really think he is in a position to threaten you, point out that he is surrounded by sentient trees and shurbs and if he does not believe you then order your shrub soldiers to begin making terrifying sounds.
Lysander: You realize where you are when you hear the horrifying sounds of shrubbery bristling, realize this man before you is Adler the one Ash has told you about, you realize you can probably extort even more gold out of him if you play your cards right.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
SpoilerShow

Quote:Adler: Is this lowfolk serious? Does he really think he is in a position to threaten you, point out that he is surrounded by sentient trees and shurbs and if he does not believe you then order your shrub soldiers to begin making terrifying sounds.
Lysander: You realize where you are when you hear the horrifying sounds of shrubbery bristling, realize this man before you is Adler the one Ash has told you about, you realize you can probably extort even more gold out of him if you play your cards right.

1021whereur.gif

"Are you kidding?" I interrupted the monkey's whining tirade.  "I don't think you realize where you are nor who you're dealing with."

Lysander paused and looked around, while the trees rustled menacingly (which was a nice touch.)

Quote:Lysander: Begin faking a knee injury even though no one touched your knees "OW! OW, OW, OW! You brutes hurt my knees I need more gold for that surgery now, oh and a bribe for me not to call the guards on you for assault"

1021knee.gif

"AY YI YI!" Lysander wailed, suddenly doubling over and clutching his knee.  "My knee!  You brutes have damaged my knee!  You're going to have to pay the cost of my surgery, as well as some hush money if you don't want me to alert the Guards to your activities here!"

Quote:>Adler: Accuse Lysander of faking it. He didn't pipe up until he heard reference to crotch punching. Lysander was faking an injury to extract money from you. You're  proud of yourself for figuring this out, you know how lowfolk work now.
>Lysander: You bristle at being referred to as a "lowfolk".

"Forget it, you faker," I scoffed dismissively. "Nobody touched your knees, and you were only pretending to be unconscious earlier.  I saw how you suddenly sprang up when I mentioned the Crotch Punch of Life.  You're just trying to pull a fast one, to extort money from me.  I know how you lowfolk operate.  You're worse than Vulpitanians."

"LOWFOLK??" Lysander exclaimed indignantly.  "That, sir, is blatant Antipathy Speech!  Why, I'll have the, uh, the Non-Elvish Anti-Antipathy Guild come down on you so fast your head will spin!  You'll never do business in these woods again!  Unless of course you're willing to make amends immediately.  You'll find that I am a reasonable monkey.  I'm willing to forgive and forget, if the price is right."
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
*Adorable plum-munching Mavis avatar by the incomparable Tronn.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Adler: This monkey is greedy and shortsighted to the point of being unreasonable. If you want this transaction to progress, you're going to have to speak his language.
>Adler: Lysander can try to pursue a lawsuit against you for short term gain, which won't work as most lowfolk don't believe in elves anymore and if he goes around saying an elf abused him in the woods he'll become a laughingstock, or he can enter into a partnership with you for long term gain that will dwarf any amount of money he'd make from a petty lawsuit. Does he know how much money a well organized cult can rake in? Your operation is becoming a franchise.
>Lysander: "How much?"
>Adler: "A lot."
>Lysander: "You have my attention."
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
(10-22-2020, 01:44 AM)tegerioreo Wrote: »See pictures at http://adleryoung.tumblr.com or perhaps http://www.patreon.com/posts/43016862 but when I was making that post I got a notification that Patreon's new AI algorithm had detected PORNOGRAPHIC CONTENT that might be in violation of the Community Guidelines.  It let me go ahead and post it, but I guess this means the post will be reviewed and I don't know what happens next

Hmmm.....perhaps it's because "crotch" was mentioned?
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Vernier: "GET RID OF THE MONKEY! HE IS A COMPLETE CHARLATAN, ALL OF HIS PEOPLE ARE!"
Adler: Ok so you realize Vernier is a bit racist, but she is right he is a greedy bastard, offer him wealth and threaten to turn him into mulch if he refuses.
Lysander: "Oh no you  can't trick me- "realize the tree branch's are inching towards you, this skunk is quite powerful and you better take the money.
Vernier: Why haven't you removed him0
Adler: Have a tree gag Vernier and stop her from making prejudiced comments for 5 seconds.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Trees: Mistakingly do more than just gag Vernier, some of her clothes end up getting ripped.

>Adler: Try not to notice how even more alluring Vernier's gotten.

>Lysander: Loudly accuse Adler of being a fiend for destroying a femme's clothes. Call him all the names you can think of. Also, set a price of 100 gold coins to buy his (Lysander's) silence, 100 more for because his (Lysander's) eyes weren't meant to see Vernier's modesty, 200 more for Vernier for some new clothes minus a 150 finder's fee (he knows a good seamstress).
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Quote:>Adler: Lysander can try to pursue a lawsuit against you for short term gain, which won't work as most lowfolk don't believe in elves anymore and if he goes around saying an elf abused him in the woods he'll become a laughingstock
Vernier: "GET RID OF THE MONKEY! HE IS A COMPLETE CHARLATAN"
threaten to turn him into mulch
Lysander: "Oh no you can't trick me- "realize the tree branch's are inching towards you, this skunk is quite powerful and you better take the money.
>Lysander: Loudly accuse Adler of being a fiend

1028nosir.gif

"Does this nincompoop have a case against me?" I asked Vernier.

"No sir, he does not," she replied. "The county's legal jurisdiction does not extend into these woods, and even if it did he would have an insurmountable burden of proof to back up his claims. Plus, the courts do not officially believe in elves, so in all likelihood if he came before a magistrate with this far-fetched story he would be laughed out of town."

It pained me to hear that the local government didn't believe in me, but I said "And what would you advise?"

"I suggest that you turn him into a clod of dirt," Vernier declared sternly. "It would be the simplest transformation since he already mostly is one."

"Oh sure, sure," Lysander scoffed. "Just like a bunch of skunks, to gang up on me. Add insult to the injuries you've already inflicted. Why must I suffer so? Sometimes I think I am under a curse."

"Shut up," I ordered him. "I do have the power to turn you into anything I please, you know."

Turning to Vernier, I asked her "Why so harsh all of a sudden?"

"I forgot that Lysander's money-grubbing obnoxiousness was the reason he had to leave town before," Vernier admitted. "It has been a long time since I've seen him, and it took a while to remember how unlikable he is."

"Did you bring me out here just to browbeat and abuse me?" Lysander retorted. "You people are sick! SICK!! I'm warning you, the day will come when you'll have to pay for your crimes!"

"I thought I told you to shut up," I snapped. "Now hold out your hand."

He did so - hesitantly - and I apported a gold piece into it.

Quote:or he can enter into a partnership with you for long term gain that will dwarf any amount of money he'd make from a petty lawsuit. Does he know how much money a well organized cult can rake in?
>Lysander: "You have my attention."

"Now, the way I see it, you have three options," I continued. "You can keep being a jerk and wind up as a piece of dirt, or you can leave here with that gold piece ... OR you can work with my organization and rake in tons of cash. Do you know how profitable a well organized cult can be? There will be plenty more gold where that came from."

1028myfriends.gif

"My friends," the monkey schmoozed as he quickly slipped the coin into his pocket. "You should have spoken up sooner. Of course I am ready to serve in any capacity of which I am able. What can Lysander M. Pontious do for you?"
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
Steampup: Surreal dog-headed Victorian adventure. Winterbough Saga Wiki: Everything we know about Faerie, its history & inhabitants.
See an edited recap of Zandar's Saga, and new pages at my Patreon. Peruse original music at Bandcamp. Or you could just Buy Me a Coffee.
*Adorable plum-munching Mavis avatar by the incomparable Tronn.
Quote
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Lysander: Go into an infomercial style sales pitch. Explain all the top o' the line firearms you have for sale. All of them most definitely not stolen!
>Adler: You... Don't understand any of this technical talk. Start griping about how low-class and uncivilized firearms are. What's wrong with bows and swords?
>Vernier: Remind Adler that if he wants to compete in the modern age, he needs to stay with the times. If everyone else has guns and artillery then so should Adler.
>Lysander: Point out that you have a VERY large family. Many, many cousins that can move a lot of product very quickly, and not just weapons. You can get Adler ANYTHING he needs. Scout's honor. (You're not a scout.)
>Vernier: NO! Not more monkeys! That's the last thing anyone needs! If they move in the entire county will become ONE GIANT SLUM!!!
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Adler: You are not interested in buying firearms (yet. .).
>Even if you have the money who would you give them too, your hairdresser cult ?
(Mind you they do regulalry handles razors and scissors, and they specialize into knwong everything thathappens around... they could make supringly good assassins if they were so inclined.. yeah, that's not happening. With maybe the exception of oak, she /was/  mercenary)
>Yeh kinda need an actual army for piles of weapons to be worth squat.
>Vernier: Maybe a couple of weapons for the cult, for self defense ? Something portable by a lady.
>Vernier: In case a gang of barber surgeon decide to muscle on your hairdresser territory...
>Adler: Anyway what you are interested in is /where/ those weapon come from
>Adler: You want him to be your spy on .... however the dichess op' daisy organisation call itself, wherever it could be now.
>Adler: That's the kind of informations you are interested in.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
Lysander: "I can you need guns, knives, pipe weed, a new horse and carriage, I can get you issues of Jane the Lowfolk Femme that aren't even out yet. What about Femmes, I am talking real classy dames? I know a girl she's a Badger names Wilma Mort she is a stunning Femme don't let the name fool you.
Adler: "Would you be quiet for a moment I will write down a list of what I need you to procure me" Write an order for basic pistols and rifles as well as enough powder and shot for training and for guard duty. "Do you know any mercenaries who could train my people for combat?"
Lysander: You remember Jimmy Two Finger Magoo is still hanging around town, though he is still mad at you for his last pistol exploding, but hey you know his type, money is everything.
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
(11-04-2020, 04:47 AM)El Sant Wrote: »  "Do you know any mercenaries who could train my people for combat?"

(Well, Oak used to be a mercenary before her transformation so y'know, maybe she still has some of the knack. Or contacts. The bigger problem here is: You're going to have to convince your cult to be soldiers ? They joined a cult about having pretty hairs, mudrer and shooting be juuuust a bit of a tough sell.(especialy firearms, do you know how dirty and smelly gunpowder fumes are ?))
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Quote:>Lysander: Go into an infomercial style sales pitch. Explain all the top o' the line firearms you have for sale.
>Adler: You... Don't understand any of this technical talk. Start griping about how low-class and uncivilized firearms are. What's wrong with bows and swords?
Remind Adler that if he wants to compete in the modern age, he needs to stay with the times. If everyone else has guns and artillery then so should Adler.

1104salepitch.gif

"Perhaps you're interested in the new Blammington Double Dealer," Lysander continued without missing a beat. "It punctures! It ruptures! It makes shrapnel fly! With two precision-milled barrels and a reciprocating dual flintlock action, you can say goodbye to your pesky old matchlock once and for all! No need to carry smoldering matchlights! No telltale smoke and sizzling! The stealth weapon for all occasions, with two - count 'em TWO deadly shots for the price of one!"

"I don't know what any of that means," I admitted. "But it all seems rather Unseelie. What's wrong with good old bows and swords?"

"These new weapons give you the advantage of inflicting grievous bodily harm from a safe distance," Lysander explained. "You can blam your enemies to smithereens before they have a chance to reach you! And besides, they've all got guns, so if you don't you're at a serious disadvantage."

"If I wanted to blam someone to smithereens," I remarked, "I would just use magick. And how is it any tactical advantage having these contraptions if everyone else is similarly armed? It seems you'll have only arrived at a stalemate."

"Which is why it's necessary to keep abreast of the latest technology," Lysander declared. "He who falls behind is dead meat!"

"Do any of your weapons use a form of steamed exploding powder?" I inquired slyly.

"No, what is that?" Lysander replied with visible perplexity.

Quote:>Adler: You are not interested in buying firearms (yet. .).
>Even if you have the money who would you give them too, your hairdresser cult ?
>Vernier: Maybe a couple of weapons for the cult, for self defense ? Something portable by a lady.
You're going to have to convince your cult to be soldiers ? They joined a cult about having pretty hairs

"It just might be the future of warfare," I stated with a mysterious grin. "But no, I think for now I don't need to buy any guns. I have a cult of hairdressers, not an army of war-hardened soldiers. As far as I know, Oak is the only one with any mercenary experience."

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"That Marten girl with the gorgeous curls?" Lysander exclaimed. "Really?"

"Actually, sir," Vernier interjected, "we could use a few small sidearms for self defense. Something small and dainty for a femme to carry."

"The O'Daisies Blunderette is just the thing!" Lysander proclaimed. "It's the lightest gun in their product line, weighing in at a mere six pounds, and can be easily concealed and carried under voluminous flowing skirts. It packs a punch, with its patented scatter-shot that can clear a room."

"All right, perhaps we'll get some of those," I acquiesced. "Is five enough to start with?"

"That should suffice for now," Vernier nodded.

Quote:>Lysander: Point out that you have a VERY large family. Many, many cousins that can move a lot of product very quickly, and not just weapons. You can get Adler ANYTHING he needs.
Lysander: "I can you need guns, knives, pipe weed, a new horse and carriage, I can get you issues of Jane the Lowfolk Femme that aren't even out yet
>Vernier: NO! Not more monkeys!

"Anything else, you name it," Lysander grinned as he noted the order in a tiny book he pulled from his pocket. "I can procure more than just weapons, you know. I've got family connections all over the place. You want knives, tools, pipeweed, lumber, corn, ants, antcarts, even copies of Jane that aren't out yet in Eire? My supply network can get it for you."

"I would advise caution, sir," Vernier whispered. "Involved dealings with his extended family could result in the whole countryside being overrun with monkeys."

Quote:>Adler: Anyway what you are interested in is /where/ those weapon come from
>Adler: You want him to be your spy on .... however the dichess op' daisy organisation call itself, wherever it could be now.
>Adler: That's the kind of informations you are interested in.

"It's not goods I'm interested in," I explained. "So much as INFORMATION. Can you tell me about where these weapons are made? You mentioned O'Daisies. Is the Duchess still in business? Where? How big is her operation? And -" (suddenly remembering something I had read in one of the scry-tower logbooks) "- have you ever heard of a place called Skeorlesburg or Skeorle Tor?"
The Ballad of Adler Young: Silly furry elf adventure. Read the RECAP: http://adleryoung.tumblr.com
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RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
>Lysander: You don't know much, you've heard Ash mention them a few times during his drunken rants while in a particularly dark mood. Tell Adler what little you know, any more he'd have to ask Ash.
>Adler: Ask Lysander too tell you more about this mysterious "Uncle Ash".
>Lysander: You finally become visibly nervous. Ash hates it when you talk about him. Change the subject to Adler's questions about weapons and the Duchess.
>Vernier: Speaking of weapons, why did Adler ask about steaming gunpowder?
>Adler: "Oh, I tried steaming some gunpowder a while back."
>Vernier and Lysander: You both go quiet and stare at Adler in disbelief.
>Adler: "Oh, come on!"
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